Tom and I lit the menorah for Chanukah last night and exchanged gifts.  I got him a gunmetal ID bracelet which saysSandy<3 Tom (gay side down).  I specifically had the back engraved instead of the front, so he didn’t have to get teased for wearing something sentimental in public.  I also had a blank book made up for him with our picture on it, because he loves to doodle, and I supplemented that with a 10 dollar League of Legends card, since I know he recently started the game and has been loving it.  In addition to the Xbox 360 Kinect which he had already gotten for me, he got me The Big Ass Book of Crafts (which I had been pining for for a while), and Minecraft! So I can play with him now, and kill pigs, and trap pigs and cows in a pen and make them do it and have babies! Oh, I am so excited.  Oh yea, and mine.
            It was nice to watch the menorah burn next to our little tree, which Tom’s mom got for us, and I decorated with dollar store ornaments and garland.  It’s low rent, but it’s nice.  And the little corner of cheer makes me smile.  We still have to decorate stockings for us and the cats (yes, I have two baby stockings for Binx and Boo, I know, cat lady central) but then we are done with the holiday chores. 
            My brother will be home from Washington for the next week, and on Friday Tom and I are going upstate to spend the night with my family.  I haven’t seen my brother since July, and I really miss him.  The only time we spend together is killing each other in Halo 3 on Xbox Live.  We are both pretty bad, haha.  For Chanukah I got Lee Left for Dead and Left for Dead 2 so we could play those games together.  I also had an extra copy of Dead Rising which I am going to give him.  After all, I only need one.  He sent me a controller and a headset for my Xbox, so I thought it most fitting that I reciprocate with an Xbox related gift.
            For my parents, a book: Yiddish with Dick and Jane.  It was Tom’s idea, and it’s such a cute little book.  I hope they like it.  This year holidays were on a tight budget but I managed to not forget the people that really count. 
            Sometimes I look at my life and I’m not sure what happened.  I almost can’t believe the life I am leading is mine.  It seems so against everything I ever wanted for myself in so many ways, but in other ways it is right there.  Who ever thought I’d be living onLong Islandand great friends with all my old friends from Stony Brook? Who ever imagined me doing inventory analysis in a production warehouse? But yet, I never would have believed I’d be hosting my first photography showcase, and gaining a following as a photographer either.  Everything happens for a reason I suppose, I have to just keep telling myself that whenever I look around and things don’t make sense.  One day they will.
            This is the first year that the holidays did not make me want to vomit all over myself.  I am with someone who is celebrating them WITH me, and considers me one of his blessings, as I do him.  It is hard to embrace this new life, but Tom makes it so much easier.  When he holds me at night, I revel in the fact that he is right there with me, no matter what.  He sees me in a way that nobody else does, and is so dear to me.  At the drop of a hat he is ready to help me, and he has, immeasurably, over the course of the last 8 months.  Decorating the tree with him and his mother was so much fun, and it has been nice to be a part of another tradition, even if it is just as an observer.
            Happy Holidays All!